Friday, September 30, 2011

Just Pull Forward: before I crack you over the head with my Starbucks.

And because you all know school drop off / pick up circles are the bane of my existence I have created a Facebook Page dedicated to the complex rules of the entire phenomenon. It's called Just Pull Forward and I invite each and every one of you to share your experiences, lest you blow your top and go psycho on some poor soul in the drop off zone, thus ruining your child's chances of ever receiving play date invitations ever again.

I'm not entirely sure what makes them so complicated. They seem simple enough. Pull in, kid gets out, drive away. Or, if you're picking up - which, granted can be slightly trickier since kids aren't exiting school in the exact order as the cars are lined up - you pull in, wait until your kid hops in, and then drive away. And if the car in front of you drives away -- and this is the tricky part -- you just pull forward (even if you're kid isn't in the car yet). The reason you do this is to make room for the car waiting behind you.

Like I tell you, tricky stuff.

The whole parking your car in the drop off lane thing? Don't get me started. There is no parking and exiting your car in the drop off lane. However, there IS parking and exiting your car in the parking lot. Do it there. Really. You can stay parked there for hours, I swear. You can feel free to saunter over to your BFF and chit chat about book club or whatever it is you're doing over there in the drop off lane blocking traffic flow. I promise. No one will bother you there or silently curse your super expensive dye job and perky, obviously paid for by your much older husband boob job.


Just Pull Forward: because drop off lanes are hard.


3 comments:

Tina, said...

OMG, don't get me started. In our town, the stay at home mothers would arrive 45 minutes before school let out in order to be first in the drop off lane, normally their child was the child that was held back in class and the last student out of the building.

When I needed to, I would pick up my child by arriving 30 minutes before class got out, park (in the parking lot), walk to the office and sign him out of class early. And all because I couldn't stand the whole pick up process!

wv: unplu

Becca said...

OMG, I am already contemplating moving to a location closer to the elementary school so I don't have to drive there. Actually, you know what? It's only like two miles. We could walk.

Muddy Road said...

I admire your activist streak, but as a friend of mine is fond of saying "there's no cure for narcissism." People who consistently ignore others' needs require something more than a reminder.

That type of "me first" behavior gives me fits, so it's a nice example for me to see someone addressing it calmly.