Skip to main content

What might happen?

My imagination has been working overtime recently. I attribute this to the large amounts of hormones overtaking my normally calm, zen-like personality. Yeah, that was sarcasm. For those of you that know me (mainly my sister, who right now is running to the bathroom before she wets herself while yelling, "Zen-like?! As if!!") you probably know that I'm a little more, uh, high-strung when it comes to safety.

I have been known to caution my children with such advice as:

"Don't ever go out of the house without me - because a stranger could take you, throw you in the trunk of their car and kill you - then you'll die!"

"Don't ever touch a dead bird - they have really bad germs and you could get them and then you'll die!"

"Don't ever go swimming without an adult present - because you could get caught in a current and drown and then you'll die!"

(My sister, the child psychologist, seems to think these cautionary statements is what has caused the Bean to be scared shitless of life in general. What does she know? Masters Degrees are so overrated....)

But the onslaught of hormones has made my fears jump to an all-time high. I worry that bad men are lurking about the perimeter of our home, which has led to a task for Big V: Install lighting around the entire home. I worry that the guy in the parking lot sitting in his car is planning an attack, so I walk with Big V to return the cart - no way I'm left alone in the car like a sitting duck. I worry about strange bacteria working it's way into our systems so I've thrown out anything and everything in our house that has passed its expiration date: Mayonaise, aspirin, sour cream, cold medicine, coupons...

Dotter is in a cheerleading camp for the next 5 weeks, what if she falls and breaks her neck and becomes paralyzed? I've seriously considered taking her out of the camp. It's just not worth it.

Jelly Bean is taking some acedemic classes at the local public highschool - do they have security? What if some crazy kid comes in with a sawed-off shotgun? Maybe she should just wait until the regular school year to start earning credits....

I need to get a handle on these fears soon, before we're all left sitting in the living room staring at each other because I'm too afraid to let anyone actually do anything. Two more months of pregnancy hormones... will we make it?

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The House that God Built

in·stan·ta·ne·ous /ˌinstənˈtānēəs/ adjective 1. occurring or done in an instant or instantly.
synonyms: immediate, instant, on-the-spot







The thing is, she died so sudden.
I didn't have the chance to plead with God, to make all the irrational promises. If he would just let her be okay.... I would start taking better care of my health. I would be nicer to the neighbor that drove me crazy. I would always let someone else go in front of me at Walmart no matter how long the line was. I wouldn't complain. Ever. I would volunteer at the Homeless Shelter. I would clean up after pigs. I would clip the toenails of the elderly. I would do anything and everything He would ask me to do....
There is a box on her death certificate that captures the amount of time between the initial injury and the time of death. It reads "seconds." I wish it read "instantaneous" because she deserves a clever word like that.
Fast forward five years.... definitely taking MUCH longer than "…

Seeing Avery All Grown Up

One day I'll tell you about the freezing cold we left and the heavy bags we lugged, full of supplies and medicines. I'll tell you about arriving in Port au Prince and walking across a cracked concrete parking lot to board an old school bus with a flat tire. How the heat was suffocating after months of below zero Wisconsin winter weather, how the people crowded and walked too close to moving traffic as we searched for a tire shop that was barely more than a couple men sitting on overturned 5-gallon buckets on the side of the road next to a pile of old tires, everything covered in dirt.

I'll tell you about waiting on the bus while they removed the tire and I'll recall the loud explosion that rocked the bus and scared the life out of me and how I was relieved to learn it was just the tire blowing after being filled too far. (They didn't have any gauges.) And then I'll tell you about the fear I felt when I realized we didn't have a tire and we were stuck on th…

When Your Imagined Life is Nothing Like This One

There were so many ways I imagined my adult life would be....THIS is not one of them.
I posted that on my Facebook wall last night. It might have been seen as funny except my choice of hashtags gave me away:
treading water getting nowhere piles of disappointment not many successes worn out and exhausted out of options

I always imagined my life would be thrilling. Full of exciting adventures and people from all over the world. I would dine at Ethiopian, Thai, and Indian restaurants. I would write books, teach English, coach forensics and direct the play. My husband would be charming and funny and not care about gender roles when it came to household chores. He would beg for at least six kids and I would fall in love with him all over again each time I caught him giving good life advice.
I would take photographs and travel the world documenting the people I came across. I would adopt a sibling group of three or maybe four and work on foster care policies because the ones we have aren't work…