Saturday, September 22, 2012

Texts From the Teen: A Variation

Sometimes I post texts I receive from my teen daughter. This is like that, except I'll post the texts I received from my sister, who was with my teen daughter. So, they're texts about my teen, not from my teen. A variation of a theme, if you will. It's actually more of a narrative delivered in text form. Anyway.... here are the texts I received from my sister about my teen:

This may require email rather than text... Teen: (standing in kitchen) "I have to pee so bad!" (does not move.) "But I'm not going to go. I'm going to hold it." (confused aunt pause) "You know, just to see how long I can." (more confused expressions from her aunt) "What? Don't you ever do that?" Aunt replies: "I can see that would be appropriate if we were in a Third World Country or if the only option was a nasty porta-potty... but we are in our house."

A few minutes later... Teen: "How many glasses of water do you think I can drink?" Me: "Until you pee your pants in my kitchen?" Then she says, "Sometimes I make up games like this. Just to see, you know. (no reply from very confused aunt) "It's why I don't have a boyfriend, isn't it?" Me: "I have to text your mom because she is the only one that will appreciate this conversation fully."

A couple observations:

(1) Kudos to my sister on the awesome texting skill! Way to smack those thumbs! I'm assuming her hands were then soaked in epsom salts.

(2) It's actually good to test yourself every once in a while. That way you'll know how far along a highway you can drive before pulling over. It's kind of like that whole driving after the empty gas light comes on test. Can you make it 45 more miles? Or only 10? It's important information to know.

(3) I once went on a road trip where the girl driving refused to pull over to let me pee. I thought I would die from a ruptured bladder. This is not so much an observation as a flashback to a very traumatic experience.

(4) I am not the only one that will fully appreciate this conversation. Because I'm sharing it with you.

1 comment:

Getrealmommy said...

Issues, girl. Issues. ;)