Thursday, September 20, 2012

It's Always Sunny Where I Live, Too

I always feel a twinge of sadness for the person who watches a sitcom and says, "whose life is like that in real life anyway?" because obviously their life is incredibly boring and that's obviously very sad. Because some people's lives really are like a sitcom.

For example some people in real life have actual conversations with their siblings that start of like this: So, I was googling how to collect dog semen.... and that just seems entirely normal. What is not entirely normal are the ways the internet suggests to actually collect the dog semen. (I advised contacting the local police department to ensure no lines are accidently crossed.)

And some people have real jobs that include working with someone who walks in and announces: So, this guy asked his neighbor for a sledgehammer so he could kill his pig and left the pig entrails in the garden covered up by cabbage leaves and now the neighbors are complaining about the smell. To which any normal person (who has watched entirely way too many episodes of Criminal Minds) would ask whether it has been confirmed they were pig guts and not people guts. Because there is a big difference, my friends. A big difference indeed. Especially if you're the pig.

I embrace my It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia life because someday they're going to want me to write for their show and I'll be ready with all the material I have to draw upon.

2 comments:

Chiconky said...

Ha! My first thought was "are we sure it's a pig?" too!

The first time my husband met my mother, she handed him a flashlight and said, "Hold this. I can't get this placenta into the wheelbarrow."

Stumbling Towards Perfect said...

@Chiconky: O.M.G. I want that drawn in cartoon fashion on a t-shirt.