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Showing posts from August 14, 2011

August is the only month without a national holiday; which is good because that would take away from My Birthday!

It's my birthday, y'all!


In honor of the 11th anniversary of my 27th birthday, I shall impart wisdom that I have learned over the years:

Boys that are suddenly interested in you twenty minutes before bar time do not want to explore a relationship with you. They want to get in your pants. And, if you let them, you don't get to cry over the fact they snuck out of your apartment under the cover of night without exchanging numbers. I don't care how cute they are or how honest and sincere they seemed; wait for the ones that take you out during daytime and talk to you long enough to at least learn your last name.

Never, ever, ever let your teenage self allow your teenage sister to cut your hair. She does not possess any special skills. None whatsoever. And it will be forever memorialized in your Sophomore Student ID picture.

The key to melting chocolate is low heat. Be patient. It may seem like it's taking forever and nothing is happening but trust me, the results will…

The 20 Year Reunion: I Survived.

I didn't pee. Not even a little bit. In fact, not at all because the one time I managed to skip away the bathroom was out of order. WHAT?!

My 20-year high school reunion was this weekend and it was awesome. I laughed. A lot. Which is exactly how reunions are supposed to go.

At one point I turned to this guy and announced, "I had the BIGGEST crush on you in sixth grade!" In my memory I made an awful fool of myself tripping to get next to his side, being over complimentary and laughing way too loud at all of his jokes. The poor guy was probably made so uncomfortable by my ridiculous behavior. He looked at me, cocked his head to the side and said, "I knew you in sixth grade?"

Yep. That's exactly how reunions are supposed to go, too.