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Showing posts from June 20, 2010

For Mom, With Love: Get me outta here!

I got a letter from Dotter in the mail yesterday. She's been at camp this past week and comes home tomorrow. The letter consisted of three small pieces of paper - about the size of a square of toilet paper. Here's what was written on the squares (mistakes and all):

Hi mom my first day was fun. I don't want to take the swim test sorry but I don't care cause I can still have fun in the shallow end. Bye Bye. God blessing on you.
Hi mom again! It's Monday. I just got back from chaple. Mr. Chris is fun and nuts. Tonight I'm going to give him candy.
Added to the bottom in different ink was this little end note:
This is the candy that he did not take. It was Skitles.
Hi mom. It's Tuesday. I like the pichture that Brody gave me. I kissed Brody. I really want to come home and stay. Four real. God blessing on you. I love you! I miss you! I wish I was home.
Now I feel guilty because she gave me God's Blessing and I sent her a letter about a chicken-cat.

Rats or Starbucks?

Our local health clinic and hospital is currently expanding. I'm guessing not everyone is happy about that because there are picketers at the corner outside the building. Helping them is a giant, blow-up rat. But then again, maybe the picketers have nothing against the medical center expansion at all. Maybe they're just a group of people protesting rats and chose this highly visible corner to express their freedom of speech. I was tempted to pull over and ask them what, specifically, they hated about rats (I, personally, have a long list - starting with that gross tail) but Dotter was freaked out over the giant, blow-up rat and I'd given her enough material for therapy already. Plus I was on my way to get a little sumpin'-sumpin' from our local Starbucks. Rats or Starbucks? I think the choice was obvious.

I Would Never Be A Lifeguard Because You Never Know Who Might See You Naked

In high school we had to take swimming. In gym. It was a requirement. We wore really odd looking swimsuits of which, I have two, because I knew they were a relic then and I thought, hey, they only increase in value with age! And plus I could use those as a punishment someday. As in If you don't clean your room I'll make you go out in public wearing my old gym swimsuit! Is that what you want?

So, yeah. Required swimming in gym class. We were so lucky to have a pool at our school. I tried to get away with the beginning "I'm scared to put my face in the water to make bubbles" class because (1) I don't like exerting any sort of physical energy, and (2) I wanted to hone my acting skills. I had everyone going pretty good - even trembling at the thought of going in water past my stomach - but was busted out when some idiot called me out from across the pool. "Hey! You were diving off the springboard at Jamie's party this weekend - you can swim!" Thanks…

Shouldn't There Be a Law Against Tornadoes at Camp?

Okay. You know how I dropped my 8-year old off for a week in the middle of nowhere? The plan was she would have fun swimming in the lake, walking on trails, skipping to the dining hall and singing camp songs... well, how was I supposed to know a tornado would find them?

I sat unblinking at the television set all evening listening to the reports, constantly yelling at Big V: Where is camp compared to this map? Point to it! And he'd point and say, "See where it says Eagle? Right next to that." And I'd get all mad and yell things like why would you tell me that? That's right where the bad part is! Now I'm more scared than I was before! Just get out of here you big jerk!  And he'd say something like "I'm sure they have a plan for this type of weather activity. They can't be a successful camp if they let campers die out there." And I would yell What do you mean die? She could die?! I was just worried she was scared and afraid - thanks a  lot…

Mail Call!

Dotter is off at camp! She'll be gone for a week, which is way too long for an 8-yr old, if you ask me, but she wanted to go and has been looking forward to it since January when the sign up sheet was mailed to us. She says she will probably miss me but will have fun anyway. She's a somewhat of a realist.

Not wanting her to be completely "without" the family this week and, more importantly, not wanting to have to pay the extra fee for eMail service (where campers visit the computer center once a day to read/compose electronic messages in true camping form) I decided to pack some surprise notes, cards and letters in her bag with the outer envelope labeled so she'd know what days to open which envelopes. Basically I don't want her to experience what life might be like without us. You know kids, they get a taste of normalcy and pretty soon that's all they're talking about. "Maddie's mother didn't pack 300 letters in her bag!"

I wrote se…