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Showing posts from December 30, 2012

From my heart to yours: Happy New Year

The year 2012 is about to close... and another year will begin.

It's funny, I guess, but I don't want 2012 to end. No more so than I wanted to deposit checks we received at Avery's funeral. I don't want to face its completion. I don't want to consider this chapter "closed."

"Closed" sounds so final. So absolute. So... unrelenting.

I know what happens to memories. They fade. I know this because I lived 14 amazing years in my childhood farm home and yet I only have the same handful of repeated memories to share: Shannon shaving the goats in the bathtub; an epic food fight with one last bean stuck to the kitchen ceiling; one fabulous play complete with a brown paper bag rainbow that we actually walked over --- but what happened in between? What did we play and sing and talk about in between the food fight and the rainbow?

I worry that time will make that in between space of Avery memories too far for my heart to span.

More space. Less memories.

M…