Friday, December 14, 2012

Too Many Children Gone

I woke up this morning to the news that a man with a knife attacked 22 innocent children at an elementary school in China. I sat stunned. All those children... children who were simply going to school.

Hours later my news feed would explode with the news that a man with a gun killed 20 innocent children (plus others) at an elementary school in Connecticut.

I cannot comprehend the pain and anguish being felt right now. Less than two months ago I lost one child and have seen the domino affect pain and anguish can have on a family; on the ones who survived; on a community. Multiply that by over FORTY CHILDREN.

Our world is hurting.

I cannot make sense of any of this. I cannot begin to make sense of the tears and nightmares and panic and anxieties that are washing through thousands of people.

I live so far physically removed from both China and Connecticut - and yet these tragedies rocked me to my core. What on earth do I do now?

I don't know.

The only thing I know is right now it isn't about gun control or administration in a government. It's not about blaming guns or blaming knives - I once had a boyfriend who picked up a skillet of boiling Hamburger Helper and threw it at my head. Should we ban frying pans, too? It wasn't the frying pan that did it; he consciously made the decision to hurt me. We need candid discussions about what we can do as a society to stop this from happening -- but not now. Now is not the time to hop on your platform.

Because right now it's about choosing to help. It's about choosing to take your confusion and your anger and your opinions and purposefully deciding to do something good instead. It's about opening a door. Being more patient. It's about using kind words, smiling and saying Thank You. It's about being someone who is caring so that you make yourself available to those who are hurting. And right now, there are a lot of people who are hurting.

So very many hurting people....

We could decide to watch that person, sitting on the side of the road, head in their hands, weeping until they had no more bones to hold them up, and pity them. We could decide to feel sorry for them. We could decide to get angry at how unfair it is that they are hurting. We could decide to hate the person who did this. Hate the school who failed to protect all those children. Hate the government that decided to allow weapons or ban weapons or hate the weapon makers themselves. We could decide to hate the family of the attackers for not knowing they were going to do this. We could decide to rant and scream and cuss!

And yet, what good is any of that to the weeping mother who has just lost her child? She doesn't want to hear your anger. She needs to feel your love.


While there is much evil in the world,
there is even more that is good.

4 comments:

Getrealmommy said...

I read another post of a friend who recently lost a loved one.she had an interesting perspective and said in the face of tragedy people often want to DO something, such as fix the problem through gun control. I agree people need to support those who have lost a child or a loved one, but I also desperately don't want to be them I'm so lucky and I want protect my family and friends and fellow humans. But how????

Grams716 said...

Bridgette, may I share your post regarding the Conn. tragedy on my FB page? It was so beautiful and just want everyone to read it!

THE LETTS FAMILY said...

OK I do agree that we need to love thy neighbor, but I disagree that this isn't about guns. How many of those 22 kids in China are dead? None. How many of the 20 kids in Connecticut were killed. 20. We definitely need to address mental health and the stigmas that go with it, not just in our country but, in the world. But in this country, we do need to address guns. There is a shooting almost every month now. If the perpetrator in each of those incidents had used a knife instead of semi-automatic assault rifles & assault pistols, there wouldn't be as many mourning families.

Mellie said...

I was horrified and saddened when I saw the news. I think though that the issue, while partly gun control, is more and more the lack of understanding and help for mental illness. The stigma that goes along with it is horrible, and in our county, as with so many others, the options for mental health are limited. There needs to be more understanding, compassion and help for the mentally ill. I can't think of too many people who have not been affected by mental illness, whether it is themselves, a spouse, a child, an uncle, etc. We need to focus on healing, not more rules to control our rights. Healing should be the goal...in the long run it would make a bigger difference. Take away guns, and those people will find other means to cause destruction. Maybe those children in China are not dead, but they still have physical wounds that need to heal, and the bigger issue is their mental health. They will be traumatized for many years to come. HEALING should be the focus, I can't stress that enough! Prayers to all those affected...