Friday, February 4, 2011

A lot of snow fell and no one was murdered in my house which is a very good thing.

It started with opening my door and finding this:


Due to creative drifting we had about a seven inch space between the wall of our house and the wall of snow encompassing our house. Thankfully we live on the top of a slight hill; I've seen pictures where people opened the doors to their homes and the snow was over their heads. Crazy. I snapped this picture with my cell phone and went back inside.

Being stuck inside a confined space with a teenager for two days is not as much fun when you are no longer a teenager and can no longer find the fun in slamming doors, rolling eyes, stomping feet and yelling you're ruining my life! at the top of your lungs.

I can proudly announce that no one was murdered or seriously maimed in or near our house during the blizzard. Personally, that was quite an accomplishment.

While I was spending my snowdays making and consuming large amounts of chili, some people (crazy people, that is) were out and about in this nonsense. I believe this video says it best: 

Enjoy People Are Crazy by Martha Berner & The Significant Others. And if you don't know who Martha Berner is, you should. She is awesome. Just by knowing who she is you've upped your awesome points by at least 25.


Tuesday, February 1, 2011

I totally blame Jersey Shore. The show. Not the actual geographical location.

I suppose I could talk about the big blizzard coming to Wisconsin, except that I live in Wisconsin and it snows all. the. time. I guess I've kind of grown to expect and accept that come winter time there will be times when we have to shovel actual snow, have the tips of our fingers fall off and cuss at your partner because he was supposed to pick up the milk and now we're all snowbound with no freaking magic to fill the baby bottles. Guess who's staying up all night with that kid? Not it.

Now, if there was some real newsworthy weather prediction to look forward to - like 90-degrees and sunny in February, I'd be as excited as the next person stockpiling sun block and the necessary ingredients to mix rum runners. But it's snowing in Wisconsin in February. That's nothing new. (Not-so-interesting fact: I have not owned a pair of snow boots once for the past 20 years. Can you tell I don't spend that much time outside in the snow? That means I don't shovel and I have all the tips of my fingers.)

Instead of discussing the weather, let's discuss a more challenging topic called What My Teen Daughter Ought to Wear to the Upcoming School Dance:




After that we can discuss Old-Fashioned All-Girls Catholic Boarding Schools Located in Wisconsin and Neighboring States and also Applying to the Nunnery After High School Even Though You're Not Catholic.

Monday, January 31, 2011

Snowstorms and Snakes

"Wouldn't that be funny if the blizzard hit when we were at our meeting? And we couldn't get home? And we'd have to stay here at the office all night long?"

Uh, I'm pretty sure it wouldn't be. I'd rather eat coconut than have a slumber party at the office. And trust me, eating coconut is no treat. I'm sure I'm not the only person on the planet who thinks coconut is a little too similar to baby toenails.

But just in case we do get snowed in, I've mentally staked out the fire proof safe room as my personal night time space. What it lacks in carpeting in makes up for in safety, being fire proof and all. And while it's true there's a big rat trap in the corner of the room, the rest of the office gets pretty cold and drafty. I'd rather share my space with a rat than freeze to death. Plus, since it's really warm in there, there's a slim-to-none chance potential snake intruders would slither their way to enjoy my body heat (because snakes hate snow, too).

What, like you don't plan ahead?